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Playoff Primer: Know Your NYAC’er July 28, 2008

Posted by Master Shake in General blog.
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As Tuesday night’s game approaches (it’s the playoff, rescheduled, remember?), we here at Penn’s Army would like to remind you, as always, to be courteous and welcoming to any out-of-town fans.  Bearing that in mind, we’ve developed this handy Penn’s Army Field Manual to recognizing our compatriots from up north so as to better understand their customs and accommodate their unique needs:

A) Recognizing the NYAC fan by their native dress:

Standard NYAC Supporter Dress

The dress of the typical NYAC fan consists of the following:

1) Captain’s hat, commonly seen on yachts.  Note: Rarely worn by actual captains, the exceptions being Captain Stubing of the Love Boat and “The Captain” Daryl Dragon of “The Captain and Tennile”;

2) Cravat, pioneered by 17th-century Frenchmen and a must for any discerning muckety-muck;

3) Blue blazer/brass buttons, preferably with crest (not shown).  If the blue blazer doesn’t scream landed gentry, then the cryptic and unholy coupling of lions and unicorns on a shield surely does.

B) Recognizing the NYAC fan by their Language: You may hear the following terminology from the NYAC supporter:

1) Cheeky, as in “My Joshua made such a cheeky pass”, or “that bone marrow was so cheekily prepared” (variant);

2) Hoi Polloi.  The rest of us, as in “I would let Nat attend public school, if it were not for the hoi polloi (rolls eyes) in Pelham”;

3) Tapas, as in “we were SO famished after driving back from the Hamptons, we threw together some tapas and fell asleep on the veranda”.  To the average citizen, this means eating small snacky-type things.  To the NYAC fan, this means artisinal cheese and kalamata olives ONLY.

Finally, learn what the word sprezzatura means.  This is an essential part of knowing your NYAC fan.

Hope this helps!  Match is @ 8PM, J. Birney Crum.  Pray for thunderstorms, we want this one starting after 9 so NYAC forfeits.

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